I'll Kill Her

Oh god.

I woke up last night after the girl visiting me had gone to sleep. I was really restless and bored, so I decided to go on a short patrol of the city to entertain myself. Also figured I'd make a few more appearances in my new duds.

I was out for an hour, wandering around in the North End, when I heard a ruckus at Cutter's Way, a small bar on Second Street. I ran out there to see what was up and a body flew out the window.

I went in to see what the commotion was, hoping for a supervillain of some kind when I saw her.

The Iris Pirate.

She was right THERE.

Oh my God. OH MY GOD!

I lunged at her, but she saw me coming and threw me into the jukebox. It literally, LITERALLY exploded. Pieces flew everywhere. I was covered in chunks of broken jukebox and quarters, scrambling to my feet. The change slipped me up under my shoes and I nearly fell.

I was PISSED, and wouldn't you know, I see the Iris Pirate making a break for the door, so I took off after her.

Damn, she's fast!

I chased her all over town for the good part of two hours. Finally, at about 4:30, she lost me, SOMEHOW. I was FUMING. I looked all over town, but finally gave up and went home at about 5:15.

My ladyfriend was up when I got home, so I changed back into my regular clothes in the yard and then came in. Told her I had gone for a walk.

The Iris Pirate is in my town.

I'm going to find her.

And I'm going to kill her.

NOBODY WEARS AN EYEPATCH BUT ME!

AND THIS IS MY GOD DAMN TURF!!